A Scar is Worth the Pain
by ramblingkitten
Summary: Emma and Killian bond over scars... Okay summary sucks just click read i promise its better than it sounds. One Shot


**A Scar is Worth the Pain**

Rating: T

Characters: Captain Killian "Hook" Jones, Emma Swan

Pairing: Captain Swan

Chapter: 1/1 - One Shot

Summary: Emma and Killian bond over past scars. (Summary sucks just click read more okay?)

A/N - Wrote this for my Secret Valentine EvertheHero on tumblr but i kinda cheated as i've had this prompt for awhile and when she asked for CS Fluff i was like YES! This prompt is from the fyesemmaandhook tumblr, I hope no one beat me to it. Prompt was: "Hook has 'phantom pains' because of his lost hand. Emma tries to sooth the pain and they get to talking about lost stuff, scars, etc." It can be read as a sequel to Dark Side but is a stand alone. I hope you like it!

**A Scar is worth the Pain**

Killian woke up slowly, noticing that light started to seep in through the few windows in the cabin telling him it was still early morning. He felt Emma still snuggled into his side and chest and allowed his good hand to smooth down her back. It was then he felt the familiar twinge of pain at the end of his left arm, where his hand would be if only he still had it. He carefully pulled the contraption off his arm so that he could massage the skin there. Unfortunately for him this wasn't one of the easier times for the pain. He bit back a groan as the pain sharpened and felt like his hand was being cut off again. Killian lost himself in the pain as he clenched and unclenched his right hand, hoping it would go away soon and he wouldn't wake Emma. She didn't need to see him like this.

Emma stubbornly kept her eyes closed; she was not ready to wake up. This had been one of the more restful night's sleep she had gotten since they were aware Cora was in town. She kept herself still and her breathing as even as she could while she listened to Hook's steady heart beat. She felt him shift underneath her and thought nothing of it, until she heard his sharp intake of breath and the sound of something hitting the floor. Emma sat bolt upright in bed and turned to look at Hook. She saw the grimace etched on his face and pondered what could be bothering him. At first she thought he was still asleep until she noticed his hook was gone. She was sure he had it on when they fell asleep.

"Killian?" Emma questioned softly as she wondered what was wrong. Killian let out a low breath as he tried to focus on her voice and not the pain.

"S'okay love, be fine in a minute." He grunted out as his right hand gripped onto his left forearm trying to take away the pain.

Emma watched his movements carefully and noticed that even the weird contraption was gone from his arm. She suddenly remembered something she read years ago about phantom pains or something; that people sometimes had when they lost limbs. On instinct she reached out and grabbed his left arm with one hand, using her free one to gently massage the end of his arm. Killian's eyes flew open feeling her touch on his scar. No one had hardly ever seen it, let alone not flinched away in disgust. Emma was oblivious to his stare as she took care to smooth both her hands against his skin.

"You don't have to do that, lass," Killian said softly, his brows knitted in pain and confusion as he watched her. She had shifted to sitting on her knees next to him as she continued her massage. She shook her head at him, her messy pony tail swishing against her back.

"I know I don't have to, but I remember one time I sprained my ankle really bad. I had been with this family for barely a month and I was the only girl, so of course I had to show I could do anything the boys could do." Emma started to tell him, her lips twitching in amusement as she thought back to the memory. "They would always climb this tree at the park, and taunt me and tell me I was a girl I couldn't do it. So I kept trying until finally one day I got as high up in the tree as one of the older boys. I was so excited that I didn't even think about the climbing down part. When I got close to the bottom I just jumped instead of climbing and I heard this awful sound from my ankle as the pain took over. They told me I would have been better off to have broken it. After it finally healed, it still hurt all the time for awhile and the only think that made it better was when the Mom of the house would massage it for me." Emma concluded.

Killian let out a low chuckle at her story; he could see her younger trying to fit in. Something told him she was never one to be told she couldn't do what anyone else could. Emma turned and looked at him after his chuckle and gave him a wry smile.

"See this scar here?" Killian asked her, turning his head slightly to the side revealing a thin pink line on his neck and collar bone. "I got that one when I joined me first crew. I was barely 15 and I wanted to be older than I was. I was such a scrawny little thing compared to these other brutes. I got in an argument with one of the men and he pulled a sword on me. I knew the basics, but he had years on me and quickly knocked me down. He cut me good but the Captain came out and said if he killed me he had to clean it up." Killian smirked as he finished his story; it faded quickly to a grimace as he felt the pain again. Emma's hands started to move again, she had gotten distracted by his voice. "Does the scar not bother you love?" Killian asked quietly. Emma pursed her lips and looked the carefully at the scar.

"No, it's a part of you Killian. Besides you should see what they left me with when I had to have an emergency c-section for Henry." When Killian's brows knitted together trying to figure out what she meant, she took her left hand off his arm and lifted her shirt up. You could see the top of the scar against the line of her pants. Killian's good hand reached out and traced the puckered line where it disappeared. "See Henry was being stubborn, he was turned the wrong way and I couldn't just have him normally. So they had to cut into my stomach and pull him out. They could have just done that to start and saved me the hours of pain but noooo, they had to wait until the last minute." She grumbled as she released her shirt and started to massage his wrist again; trying and failing to ignore the tingling she had felt when his hand had touched her skin.

Killian's eyes sparkled as he sat up and pull his shirt up, turning out of her grasp to show her his back. There was an impressive looking series of scars along his skin, some looked like he had been cut, like his one on his neck. Others she couldn't quiet place.

"Ignore the whip scars darling, look at the one on my shoulder blade." Emma winced when he told her what the other scars were. She could only imagine how he got those and none of them were pretty. She instead focused on his shoulder and sure enough there was a jagged scar there. She touched it feeling across the puckered skin. "I got that one when I stole my ship. She was brand new, built from enchanted wood for a King. The fairies had given them the trees to make it as a gift. She hadn't even been sailed yet. The two guards that were on duty were so easy to trick, I didn't even have to kill them. I had gotten another lad to help me, it's not that easy to sail a ship of her size by myself. I thought we were in the clear as we got the last rope tied and started out, but the guards had returned. The lad was knocked unconscious and I got that on my back. I managed to shove the guard overboard and sailed out to open water. I never looked back." Killian told her, his eyes were far off and his voice was reverent as he spoke of his ship. As he lowered his shirt and turned back to Emma, she gave him back his own smirk.

"How's the wrist?" She asked softly, she wasn't about to tell him how she was impressed, he didn't need an ego boost. But something told her he could tell by the look in her eyes when he smirked back at her.

"Better," He told her, his own hand smoothing across the scar there. "Doesn't happen all the time, barely at all anymore actually; which could be why it caught me off guard this morning." He explained to her honestly. Emma nodded at him and watched him focus on the scar. She reached down and pulled up her pant leg and showed him her calf where there was a small scar across the back of it.

"See this one?" She asked as he slowly refocused on her leg. "That one I got when Neal and I got cleaned up and went to this really nice restaurant. I had this really pretty dress on and got to eat this really great food. But of course we couldn't pay so we snuck off to the bathroom and went out the window. I managed to get my leg caught on something and cut it open. It was a mess, blood everywhere and it just wouldn't quit. I think there were at least 17 stitches across it." She told him with a shake of her head. Killian was looking at her different now, and she couldn't figure it out.

"Neal was the bloke who put the scar on your heart wasn't he?" Killian asked her, his eyes serious as Emma smoothed her pant leg back down. Emma let out a soft sigh and self deprecating laugh.

"Yeah, I guess you could put it that way. Long story short, I met him when I stole a car he had already stolen and he was still in it. We bonded over both being thieves, we were even going to stop and settle down. But he found out he was wanted for some job he pulled. He wanted to leave, and I convinced him to let me get the goods, they weren't looking for me. But in the end he betrayed me and turned me in and I went to jail. I found out about Henry in there and gave him up." She told him, her eyes faraway. Killian reached his hand forward and squeezed her shoulder.

"He didn't deserve you, lass. A man unwilling to fight for what he wants deserves what he gets. You deserve someone who wants to fight for you." Killian told her with a small smile. Emma smiled back and cleared her throat.

"That's two stories to none, you owe me." She told him with a chuckle. Killian just shook his head and moved his left arm back into her reach. He tapped his finger on the inside of his wrist, bringing her attention to what looked like a raised letter P.

"That love, I got when I made the mistake of sailing the wrong way one day in Neverland. Don't give me that look," Killian told her when Emma raised an eyebrow and smirked, "It is possible when you are there. I ended up I think in this world, only not this time period. Women were still dressed close to what I remembered from back home. Tortuga was a fabulous place for a pirate then. I made the mistake of helping a pirate named Jack when he lost his ship. Unfortunately that also took me across some of the more well behaving sailors of some trading company. They branded me with this before I got away and stole my ship back. Luckily I had managed to capture one of the pixies before the accident so I was able to get back to Neverland not long later." He told her laughing form. "What is so funny love?" He asked, severely curious as to her laughter.

"It's just, you got lost and you met Captain Jack Sparrow, and I can't wait to tell Henry this. He is going to love it." She got out in between fits of laughter. Killian shook his head and let out a chuckle seeing her so carefree. "It's just he's supposed to be a movie character." When Killian looked confused by the word movie, Emma shook her head. "I will show you one day, I guess I shouldn't be surprised, I mean look at who I am having the conversation with. You are supposed to be a storybook character not real." She told him, with a sigh.

"Oh I assure you love, I am real. Would you like to come closer and feel for yourself?" He asked with a waggle of his brow and a self confident smirk. Emma just laughed and smacked his shoulder.

"You still owe me one more you know." She told him with a side long glance.

"Aye, that I do," Killian told her as he pondered which scar to tell her about. He got a smirk on his face as he pulled his shirt up and indicated towards his stomach. Emma saw the thin scar that ran from his side to near his belly button. "That one I got in a tavern brawl. I made the mistake of saying something to a woman whose husband happened to overhear. He didn't take too kindly to my type of flirtations." He told her with a wink. "Needless to say he challenged me for offending his wife's honor. I made a quip about how most wives with honor weren't found at the local tavern dressed like common wenches. And I found myself in a sword fight. He got a lucky jab in and sliced open my stomach, luckily not very deep. I paid him back with a good stab in the thigh. The tavern owner was not too keen on us fighting in the middle of his tavern and threw us both out. His wife came up and dragged him away as my men helped me back to my ship."

"I should of known not even getting stabbed would convince you to stop with the innuendo laden quips." She told him with a shake of her head. Killian just smirked at her. "If I tell you one more, would you tell me about Milah?" Emma asked him carefully. She felt him tense next to her and grimaced, "If it's too hard I understand I'm just curious." Killian let out a low sigh and looked up to meet her eyes. When he saw understanding in her eyes, he gave her a small smile.

"Aye, lass I think I can." He told her, reaching out his good hand and giving her knee a squeeze. When Emma's whole body jumped at the contact he quirked an eyebrow at her.

"Sorry I'm just ticklish," Emma told him with a shake of her head and when Killian smirked full on at her, she knew she was in trouble in the future. "Anyway," She started as she tilted her head down and to the side, moving her loose hair. Killian could see a faint scar starting on her neck and disappearing into her hair. "This one isn't a good memory. I didn't always get nice foster families, sometimes you ducked and made sure you didn't do anything wrong. And even then sometimes bad things happened. The father was a drunk, and an idiot and I was 13 and mouthy. I couldn't get a family that wanted to keep me and I was tired of all of it. I made the mistake of saying the wrong thing to him when he was drunk after the social service worker came by to check on me. Make sure I was being fed and clothed. I happened to have played football with some of the other kids and was a mess, my knee was bloody and his wife had to try and explain her way out of it when no one would just listen to me. I snapped and mouthed off and he shoved me. I hit my head on a desk nearby and nearly got knocked out. I was so dizzy and his wife was screaming. There was all this blood and I was so scared. The nurses at the hospital asked me over and over again for the truth. And I finally told them he pushed me, so I go to go to a new home." She told him, her hands unconsciously wringing together at the memory. She looked up and saw anger in Killian's eyes so she reached forward and squeezed his hand to get his attention.

"Don't worry he went to jail for a long time after that. And I'm sure in jail he didn't have a good time. Most people frown upon people who hurt kids." She told him with a sad smile. Killian nodded and pulled her into his lap hugging her close. Emma let out a soft sigh and wrapped her arms around him.

"I'm sorry you had to go through that, lass." Killian told her honestly, pressing his lips to her temple. He was quiet for a long while, content just holding Emma in his arms while he got his thoughts together on Milah. When he finally spoke again Emma started in shock.

"Milah, she was an amazing woman. So full of life and she wanted adventure. She was enchanted by me, listened to every word as I told her tales of my far off journeys. She wasn't a pushover and when she smiled her whole body was alive with it. When she asked me to take her on my ship, I couldn't refuse her. She joined me and my men, and fit in so well. I slowly fell in love with her, and I know she started to fall in love with me within moments of our first meeting. I felt a slight tinge of guilt taking her away from her lad, as did she, but she assured me her husband, while a coward, was a good father. When she died she took away part of my soul." Killian finished his tale, his voice soft. Emma just tightened her arms around his middle, knowing he needed a moment to himself. When she felt him shift her in his arms she looked up to see his ocean blue eyes looking down at her. She gave him a soft smile which he returned.

"I'm sorry about Milah, I can hear how much you cared when you talk about her." Emma told him with a sad smile. Killian nodded and pressed his lips to her forehead.

"I did, when the dark one crushed her heart, I felt for the longest time he crushed mine as well. I wished he had when I couldn't numb myself to the pain of missing her." Killian whispered. Emma pressed her lips to his cheek.

"You are allowed to miss people Killian, you just can't let it rule your every thought or you won't be able to breathe." Emma told him watching his features as he took in her words.

"What if I don't know how?" Killian asked her as he looked back down at her, his normally light blue eyes darker and taken on a lost quality.

"Then I'll remind you how to breathe when you forget." Emma told him with a soft smile. Killian returned her smile with one of his own, his features long since smoothed out. Emma shifted so she could reach his left arm again. She smoothed her fingers over the scar again. Killian rested his head against hers as she continued to caress his stump and arm. His world came to a halt when he felt his swan place a soft kiss to the scar. He quickly looked down and saw her looking back at him with a soft open look. He opened his mouth to say something but failed; and Emma gave him a crooked smile.

"I told you, it's a part of you Killian. And I care about all of you." Emma said softly as she set his arm back down against her hip. Killian used it to pull her closer as his good hand gripped the back of her neck.

"You are a marvel Emma," Killian told her in a revered tone before he pulled her closer and kissed her. His lips slanting across hers as her arms wound around his neck returning his kiss. Their lips moved in sync, their breath mingling and their bodies pressed tight to each other. When they finally had to pull apart their breathing was ragged. Emma leaned herself against Killian's chest as his hand pulled the band out of what was left of her pony tail. His hand slowly smoothing down the back of her head, "Don't leave me, Emma." Killian whispered so softly, if Emma hadn't been leaning against him she never would have heard it.


End file.
